


Then and Now

by AemiliaFawn



Series: Malec Drabbles & Oneshots [8]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-27
Updated: 2019-04-27
Packaged: 2020-02-07 09:20:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18617725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AemiliaFawn/pseuds/AemiliaFawn
Summary: When Magnus realized just how much his relationship with Alec had changed him, he couldn't help but worry he'd become a boring old man at long last. Thankfully Alec is right there to reassure him that this is far from the truth.





	Then and Now

**Then and Now**

It was an early Sunday morning when Magnus watched Alec make pancakes for breakfast and realized he had become a very boring person.  
  
It occurred to him suddenly without any real reason. He figured he had been aware of it subconsciously for a while now, but just like being pointed out a tiny stain on a pristine white rug you hadn't noticed before - suddenly, that tiny stain was all you could see, and it seemed to grow with each passing second until you _knew_ you wouldn't rest easy until something would be done about it. Magnus just didn't understand how or why it had happened. He used to live for parties. He used to be the _life_ of every party too - a party without Magnus Bane was always one which was considered incredibly dull, and now that Magnus thought of it, he couldn't even remember the last time he had stopped by his own _club_.  
  
"Dear God," Magnus said, causing Alec to curiously glance over his bare shoulder, "it has finally happened."  
  
"What? What happened?" Alec pressed as he plated their pancakes. He was wearing one of Magnus' silk pajama bottoms and his rune-marked chest was on full display because he had neglected to wear a t-shirt. It was warm in the loft - that's what happened when the building was tall, the windows were large and Summer was fast approaching. Magnus was briefly distracted by one of Alec's newer runes on his lower back, which had been drawn by Isabelle during a raid only yesterday. The bruises Alec had acquired along with it had been healed with the iratze on Alec's rib cage. Alec's skin was flawless and he had a healthy glow about him.

Magnus glanced up when Alec set Magnus' plate down on the dinner table in front of him and poured the right amount of maple syrup over Magnus' pancakes without asking Magnus if he wanted any. The Lightwoods could be absolute horrors in the kitchen, but thankfully this one at least knew how to make a decent breakfast. It smelt delicious and Magnus could feel his mouth water.  
  
Yet he still sighed mournfully.  
  
"I've become a boring old man, Alexander," he lamented as he started cutting himself a piece of pancake before he popped it into his mouth. Magnus closed his eyes as he savored the sweet taste on his tongue. Whereas it tasted amazing and Magnus wanted to eat these every morning for the rest of his life, his thoughts still made for a bitter aftertaste while he pondered on them. "I used to sleep my Sundays away because I was too hungover from partying all night. Now look at me – pancakes on a Sunday morning, up before sunset. I don't think I could get any more Mundane."  
  
Alec glanced Magnus over. Magnus sat there before him in his open silk robe and a pair of black boxer briefs, hair messy and face void of make up. They'd finally reached that level in their relationship where Magnus allowed Alec to see him stripped bare off anything he was known for - glitter, jewels, fancy clothes. He must look so plain to his beloved Shadowhunter. Magnus suddenly became very self-conscious, and he shifted in his seat. Perhaps he'd grown too comfortable. There was no more mystery about him anymore - Alec knew him, inside out, and there was nothing left of Magnus to discover save from a few events in his past which Magnus didn't deem important enough to really count. Magnus had put all of his cards on the table a long time ago.

It had seemed like a good idea at the time.

"There's nothing boring about you," Alec finally disagreed once he had stared his fill. He shoved some food into his mouth and Magnus pursed his lips when he noticed Alec appeared a little displeased. He didn't know what he'd done to cause that frown on Alec's face. "And you say that like being hungover is a good thing."  
  
"It was if the night before was amazing," Magnus mumbled into his cup of coffee.

Alec set down his fork and knife on the table and fixed Magnus with a dire look.  
  
"Why are you really sulking?" He asked very sternly. "If you wanted to go to parties you'd go. You know I wouldn't stop you - I'd come with you if you'd ask me to."

Magnus sighed again and set his cup down. He traced his fingertips along the edge of it contemplatively.  
  
"I guess I just never thought I'd grow out of it and be so... Domestic with someone. Let alone have a steady relationship."

A flicker of worry passed Alec's features and when Alec asked a hurt little "Is that not what you want?" Magnus realized he had used a rather poor choice of words. His words could be interpreted as complaints, and that couldn't be farther from the truth. Magnus was fully aware that he was happy being the way he was right now, happier than he'd ever been when he'd still been a restless soul, but...  
  
"My darling Alexander - it's everything I ever dreamt of. But you fell in love with the old me. The one who used to be wild and surprising and glamorous..."

There it was - the real root of the problem. Averting his eyes, Magnus toyed with the possibility of just excusing himself from the dinner table altogether. He knew he was being petulant, and on the edge of ruining their morning together, and he didn't want to do that. He didn't  _like_ doing that. But he came to understand that it bothered him because it might bother Alec, and Alec was all that mattered.

While Magnus was studying the blue patterns on his cup he didn't notice the way all tension slid from Alec's body, nor the soft, understanding expression slowly growing on Alec's face. He was just about to stand up when Alec's hand slid across the dinner table to take hold of Magnus', fingers sliding into the vacant spaces between those of Magnus with practiced ease.

"Magnus."

Magnus glanced up hesitantly. Alec smiled tenderly and he could breathe a little lighter.

"You're still all of those things, and so much more. You're everything to me. Everything I ever wanted and everything I didn't even know I wanted or needed in my life until I met you."

Alec's lips were soft when they pressed a kiss against the back of Magnus' hand.

"The only difference between then and now is that someone right now loves you very much, and you love them enough to want to stay home and cuddle on the couch together instead of getting drunk by yourself in some bar. You occasionally dressing down or living a less crazy life isn't gonna make me bored of you. You know I think you're the most interesting person on the planet."

_Someone right now loves you very much._

Magnus has heard Alec say it countless times in countless situations. In bed, at the Institute, in foreign countries, on the couch, in the doorway, in public places. It had been spoken to him as a promise, a confession, a goodbye, a hello, a plea. He had believed those three words all of those times and he believed them now, right here, as they were spoken to him at the dinner table as a simple fact.

The sky was blue. Water was wet. Alexander Gideon Lightwood loved Magnus Bane with all of his heart.

Alec dug the side of his fork into his pancake so he wouldn't have to let go of Magnus' hand to cut the piece off with his knife instead, and looked Magnus calmly in the eye as he put it into his mouth and chewed. Alec was right and they both knew it. Maybe all that time Magnus had been at those parties because he'd looking for something like this, someone to be this way with - always searching crowds of sweating, grinding bodies, trying to find that one perfect match. And now that he had finally found it he had allowed himself to stop looking and partying and just  _breathe_ and enjoy the smaller things in life.

Before Alec, Magnus hadn't bothered getting up early to enjoy the first rays of sunlight. He hadn't taken the time to enjoy the process of creating his own meals. He hadn't  _cared_ about every single day nor about how he was going to spend it the way he currently did.

Magnus was wrong. These were all positive changes. He had nothing to complain about.

He swallowed the lump in his throat and all of his prior worries were gone.  
  
"These pancakes are amazing," Magnus complimented Alec with a smile once he finally started eating again. They were rapidly growing cold already, soggy with maple syrup, but they were made with love, and that made them taste like the most wonderful pancakes Magnus has ever had in his long life. Alec squeezed his hand with a content hum.

“If you want to spice things up then next time, I can just throw some jalapenos into the batter,” Alec offered, though Magnus was wise enough to read between the lines.

_If you want things to change, if you're not happy like this, I'm more than willing to adjust to fit any of your needs._

Magnus traced Alec's knuckles with his thumb. They had a good life right now. People changed – growing up, it didn't have to be a bad thing. He never had a reason to do so, not before Alec, but he thought he rather enjoyed it.

“Vanilla tastes just fine to me,” Magnus decided with a content smile.

As long as he wouldn't start wearing turtleneck sweaters and complaining about _kids these days_ , Magnus was happy with the way he was.

 

**Author's Note:**

> A while back I was thinking about what they depicted Magnus like in season 1 - he was this crazy, extravagant, mysterious warlock who was both untouchable and wild. It lasted for maybe only two or three episodes before everyone's views on Magnus changed because everyone realized that Magnus was really just a soft wounded man who desperately wanted to love and be loved. One thing led to another and I somehow ended up writing this. I'm not really sure how I feel about this one, what do you guys think?


End file.
